Category: Life

Every other post.

  • Anatomy of a Transphobic Article

    Anatomy of a Transphobic Article

    I was deeply dismayed when the Globe and Mail published a transphobic article written by Margaret Wente over the weekend. I bring it up because on the outset that article seems innocuous. Clearly the editorial staff didn’t see any problem with it.

    To give a bit of context, this article follows a positive piece done by MacLean’s on gender variant children. If you haven’t read it already, I would recommend that you do so. I’ll wait.

    MacLean's article on trans and gender creative youth.
    MacLean’s article on trans and gender creative youth.

    Margaret Wente’s article by contrast has a negative take on trans and gender creative youth. She perpetuates harmful misconceptions and concludes by advocating against acceptance of these children’s expression. Absent from her article are the voices of the subjects for whom this is supposedly written to benefit: the children or their adult selves. Instead, she only gives platform to their detractors.

    I want to talk about this because this is what transphobia and for that matter homophobia looks like in Canada. It’s damage can not be understated. Mainstream society has a misguided belief that gay marriage and bashings serve as indicators of bigotry. This is only partly true. The brunt of the hostilities are manifested in an environment constantly hostile to genuine expression. 

    It’s everywhere. Canadian politicians openly equate trans women with pedophiles. Films and television shows aired in Canada regularly treat trans folk as no more than living jokes. Positive portrayals are so rare as to be applauded. Ontario schools still move to ban support groups aimed at queer youth.

    Then there’s the public whose views lag the legislative framework. 74% of trans students report receiving verbal harassment over their gender expression. 37% report being physically harassed. 64% report feeling unsafe at school. Half the homeless youth in Ottawa are queer. 57% of trans people face lack of acceptance from coworkers. When we are talking about acceptance around youth, we are talking about saving lives.

    Margaret Wente contributes to a climate that views diverse gender expression as something to be suppressed. Let’s look at glimpses of her article in more detail.

    What happens when your son tells you he’s really a girl?

    Twenty years ago, you probably would have crossed your fingers and tried to wait it out. Today, you might buy him a whole new wardrobe, find someone to prescribe hormone blockers, and help him live as a girl. Maybe he’ll even become a celebrity. A recent Maclean’s magazine cover, posing that very question, featured a lovely 11-year-old with long, flowing locks and enormous eyes. His name used to be Oliver.

    What’s noteworthy here is that the subject is a young girl. This is her identity and has been for as long as she’s had the ability to express herself. She’s been seeing a pediatrician at the McGill University Health Centre to assist her for years. In the MacLean’s article she affirms that “for the first time ever, she’s comfortable.”

    Margaret Wente doesn’t use her name, referring to the male one she was assigned at birth, and repeatedly refers to her as “he” and “his.” The author makes it clear that there is no bar for the child to attain at which Wente would have accepted them. This sets the tone for what follows.

    Suddenly transgender kids are everywhere – in the news, on Dr. Phil and in your neighbourhood. School boards have developed detailed transgender policies. Clinics to treat transgender kids have sprung up. A condition that used to be vanishingly rare, perhaps one in 10,000 children or less, now seems common. In a random sampling of 6th- to 8th-graders in San Francisco, kids were asked if they identified as male, female or transgendered – 1.3 per cent checked off the transgendered box.

    “The No. 1 factor is the Internet,” he said. “If you’re struggling to find out where you fit, the Internet is filled with things about gender dysphoria.”

    “When we ask, ‘When did you first learn about this label of gender dysphoria’, they’ll say, ‘Me and Mom watched Oprah,’ ” adds Dr. Hayley Wood, a member of his team.

    References to the Internet and talk shows is meant to discredit the voices of the youth. It plays to the stereotype that these are unreliable sources of information. Granted, they absolutely can be. However, the places people go to aren’t someone’s GeoCitie’s page from 1996. It’s the Center for Addiction and Mental Health. It’s the Central Toronto Youth Services. It’s the Vancouver Coastal Health. Provincially funded establishments that use evidence-based research to inform. This is where people turn to.

    Furthermore, let’s not forget that finding words that resonate from a talk show guest doesn’t invalidate your own experiences. Sometimes it’s the only place to find a voice on television that doesn’t dehumanize trans people.

    The insinuation looking at the upsurge in self-identification are that this is a fad. Absent from her discussion are other reasons to account for the rise. As one person wrote: “there is no sudden “queer identity fad” caused by the internet. you’ve just been wrapped up in your sad tiny world, never noticing the expansive world of queer people you’ve been erasing the existence of by assuming they’re all cis and straight like you.”

    That’s why Dr. Zucker takes a watch-and-wait approach. He even advises parents of princessy six-year-olds to say, “You’re not a girl. You’re a boy.”

    And in the hotly politicized world of gender politics, that makes him, in many people’s eyes, a dangerous reactionary.

    Just what constitutes a “princessy” six year old? Why should anyone shame a little child for expressing interest in any thing merely because it’s associated with girls? This mentality just makes me so sad.

    Note too that those who would support such a child are attributed the hyperbolic statement of “dangerous reactionary.” The hyperbole serves to discredit them. But no one has really said that. Wente is giving them a voice she imagines.

    One reason is that social norms have dramatically changed. It is now fashionable to embrace your diverse child.

    The author portrays embracing a diverse child as a negative, which I find disheartening.

    Parents who encourage their kids to change gender “are socially rewarded as wonderful and accepting,” while parents who try to take it slow “are seen as unaccepting, lacking in affection and conservative,” she says.

    These days, parents who don’t like the slow-and-careful answer can shop for another one. Ms. Dreger is highly critical of what she calls the “hasty clinics,” which are happy to help a kid transition right away. “Parents don’t like uncertainty,” she says. “They’d rather be told, ‘Here’s the diagnosis, and it’s all gonna turn out fine.’” Teenagers can find fast help, too. Plenty of doctors are happy to help them out with hormone treatments just for the asking.

    This absolutely ignores the reality of how care works. First off, please point me to one of these clinics. Then I wouldn’t of had to have waited ten months after first applying to start hormone replacement therapy, not to mention four months of having my gender deconstructed by a stranger.

    It also ignores the long journey that both parent and child take. It’s not that the kid voices things on Monday and Tuesday they’re on hormone blockers. There’s a long process there. That’s the reality of the care.

    For some people, including some adolescents, transgender treatment is lifesaving. But these treatments are neither simple nor benign. They may, among other things, retard maturation, suppress your growth or render you sterile. And in the end, medical science cannot create a body that makes you forget you were born the other sex.

    In the end, people like Margaret Wente make sure that you never forget that you were born the other sex. Cue her opening paragraph. But the aim in medical transition isn’t to forget the past. It’s to have a future. This inability for others to get past a person’s trans history or their gender expression is something else entirely.

    Disturbingly, data on long-term outcomes for transgender kids are scarce. No one is tracking the evidence on puberty-blocking intervention either.

    This is factually false. There is plenty of research on puberty-blocking interventions and trans youth; Margaret Wente just had to do a quick search on Google Scholar to see as much. However, not everyone who reads her article on the Globe and Mail will fact-check this. That makes such statements harmful because they perpetuate misconceptions that could be used to delay or deny care to the youth who need it.

    Here’s more unwelcome news from Ms. Dreger. A child’s gender issue may merely be a symptom of other family problems. “The dirty little secret is that many of these families have big dysfunctional issues. When you get the clinicians over a beer, they’ll tell you the truth. A lot of the parents aren’t well in terms of their mental health. They think that once the child transitions, all their problems will magically go away, but that’s not really where the stress is located.” Clinicians won’t say these things publicly, she says, because they don’t want to sound as if they’re blaming gender problems on screwed-up families.

    This statement is of very shoddy journalistic integrity. These are entirely unverifiable statements. I have never heard this to actually be the case, though I am familiar with the trope. It plays into a stereotype that the reason a kid grows up gay or trans is because of their mom or family troubles.

    It’s a mark of social progress that we are increasingly willing to accept people on their terms, for who they are. But maybe we’re manufacturing more problems than we’re solving. If we really want to help people, we should remember the old rule: First, do no harm.

    Unfortunately, harm is exactly the outcome of not accepting children for who they are, imposing patriarchal gender roles, and denying them voice. This is the stuff that makes people seek therapy later in life. This is what transphobia looks like. It is pervasive. It is toxic. I think it’s quite telling that Margaret Wente did not choose to interview actual children or the adults they grew into, nor their families. I suspect their story would have gotten in the way of spreading falsehoods.

    Gender variance isn’t abnormal with children. Some of them might end up realizing they’re gay, trans, or none of the above. Especially that latter possibility, because there is nothing wrong with a boy that plays with dolls. Nonetheless it’s perfectly okay to not know what to do when a child expresses something you don’t understand. But one thing you do know how to do is to embrace them and inform yourself.

    Fear mongering articles like this want to scare you away from taking that first step of informing yourself. You’ll discover that there’s lots of avenues for support for people like you and your child. That seeking care doesn’t mean medical intervention tomorrow it just means being there for your child today. That the people you turn to aren’t doctors with revoked licenses, but mainstream practitioners. That your child is able to express themselves more authentically, however that may be, is not a bad thing.

    Margaret Wente doesn’t see things that way. She doesn’t view trans and gender creative children as to be accepted. She’s not alone. Most of the country is pretty intolerant around gender expression and that has a demonstrable health impact on the recipients of their scorn.

    It is not wrong for her to question practices. However, merely having an opinion does not give it equal worth. The suppression of individual expression that Margaret Wente advocates is rooted in neither science, studies, nor the voices of her subjects. They’re all quite clear on the harm of that oppression. It is only based in personal prejudice. A reputable national newspaper should know better than to be a platform on which to further marginalize a vulnerable segment of society.

    I’m deeply disappointed at the Globe and Mail for having published this transphobic article.

  • A Small Victory

    A Small Victory

    Back in September I noticed that someone at Bridgehead had taped a trans flag to the front door. I thought that was really cool. Someone had gone out of their way to let you know that this was a safe space. In a city with so few of these spaces, that meant something.

    Old Trans Flag

    That paper flag got progressively worn with time until the day in January that I noticed it was gone. So I decided that I was going to have a durable sticker professionally printed for them.

    I looked online for that particular flag and found that it had been created by a local graphic designer. At this stage I was uneasy with making use of it because it was under copyright. Symbols that people rally around should not come with strings attached.

    Screenshot from 2014-01-31 19:44:52

    Still the other trans flags didn’t convey its meaning as effectively and this was the one that had been used. I emailed the designer for permission to use it. They said yes. More to the point I found the wording on its use reassuring. They wanted this to be out there.

    I downloaded a raster image and set to vectorize it in Inkscape.

    The original image.
    The original image I had downloaded.
    The vectorized version I produced in Inkscape.
    The vectorized version I produced in Inkscape.

    After I was happy with the vector image I submitted it to VistaPrint to get it in sticker form. It cost $20 for 20 stickers, with most of the cost being weighted towards shipping. When the results came back, they were pretty disappointing. The quality just wasn’t there. The images were pixelated and the paper quality was on-par with what you could get at Staples.

    IMG_20140117_102151

    So I tried again, this time making twenty vinyl-backed individually cut stickers through StickerYou. It was still $20, though the cost was weighted towards the stickers themselves. When they came in, I found the results to be much better! There was a white border around the stickers which wasn’t expected given the healthy bleed margins I had used, but whatever.

    IMG_20140123_191102

    I put some stickers in an envelope and went to Bridgehead. I ordered a coffee and asked for the manager. I told her that the flag they had was gone, but that I had made these stickers to replace it. Then a rush hit and the envelope got set aside.

    I visited back that night and the sticker had been put up! That felt awesome. I took this photo the very next day.

    IMG_20140126_094723

    I realize that this is a very small thing, but I’m really proud of this. 🙂

  • Accessible Programming, Part Four

    Accessible Programming, Part Four

    I’ve written three pieces now on a fictitious visual programming language. The goal was to tap into years of user experience work to come up with an approach that would significantly reduce the learning curve associated with programming. As I wrote in 2012:

    Make this easy enough, and you might tap into an audience of “casual programmers” that use this to assist them in their daily doings. No one’s come up with a successful programming analogue to the likes of Microsoft Access that appeals to the likes of secretaries and payroll officers. There’s room for one.

    I’ve come to realize that my approach was flawed because I was getting the audience wrong. I wanted this to be for the everyday consumer, but was building it for programmers. I was conjuring a tool (the programming environment) that then made the tools (programs) that then accomplished a desired task. Only programmers care about making tools that do things. The average person just wants to do things.

    So the idea then becomes to provide an environment for the user to automate tasks. To chain tasks. To provide a standard interface to the things the user uses. More along the lines of a graphical bash script. Skip this middle step of building tools. Now the things that a consumer uses on a computer is no longer confined to the hardware of the box on which they type: they store files Google Drive, post pictures on Instagram, make a note on Twitter, etc.

    The file and standard input/output are no longer the standard mechanisms of interchange. You now have these web services, with their own authentication schemes and APIs. This has to be accounted for and handled by the programming environment, such that what comes out to be accessible to the user can in fact be chained to other components.

    Access to different elements – the device’s GPS and onboard camera, Twitter, a file – would for the consumer be treated the same way. Oh sure they might have to plug in their Tumblr username in the little widget representing access to that service, but what comes out would be in a dictionary format consistent and the user wouldn’t have to worry about implementation specifics. For the consumer, it would be no more complicated to read a post from Tumblr as it would be to read a local file.

    In the flow-based programming model, each of these elements would be its own block. Consumers could import blocks to access more services. Perhaps some of these blocks would be available for purchase from third-parties. The block that plays a music file might be part of the free base package, but the one that uploads to SoundCloud might be $0.99. The programming environment would merely serve as the framework to chain these blocks together.

    So what kinds of things would you build with this? You could have for instance:

    • When it’s 6pm, publish this note to my blog.
    • When I’m at this location, send an SMS to my friend.
    • When I take a photo, save a copy to my online storage.
    • When my work sends me an email, send this automated reply back.
    • When I press this button, I want you to do that and do this thing.

    I think that’s how you get closer to a product that’s  more accessible and bring programming to the masses. It’s also well suited to the low-level of complexity that have defined tablet/mobile interfaces. Is it still programming in this case? I’d contend so. 

    Adopting this model means foregoing the flexibility and power of a general purpose programming language. That’s okay because we’re minding the audience and building a demand for programming tools where none existed. That’s a good thing. If its limitations are ever an issue, then the user will always be able to jump to something better suited to their expanded needs, like Python.

  • When Social Justice is Not

    When Social Justice is Not

    This is about why I’m distancing myself away from the activist queer community. It has to with how a clique has developed, and how social justice has been used as the pretense to create it.

    I think what makes this particular problem hard to recognize is that social justice is itself about ending systems of oppression and developing empathy. It would then be unintuitive that a community built around these principles would then itself foster a system of kyriarchy.

    It should not be that surprising. It’s been my experience in other communities that that kind of shit happens even if the pronounced values are about some notion of equality.

    In terms of the local queer clique, people’s status elevates according to how “inclusive” they are. I put that word in bunny quotes because it’s not about genuine inclusion, so much as a narrow definition based on what’s popular on Tumblr. There’s a disconnect. Some examples from my own experience:

    • I get ID’ed as a butch trans woman. I now find myself invited to speak at events on no merit other than my identity. The queer sj folk who invite me see me as a label, not as the person behind it. It’s dehumanizing because I’m a checkbox now and reduced to a metric that has nothing to do with who I am or what I’ve done. These people meanwhile pat themselves on the back for their inclusion. But it’s a broken notion of inclusion.
    • The only time I see fat bodies represented in queer material is when it’s in the context of raising awareness about fat shaming. A post on Tumblr; a talk here. But you look at all the other stuff that’s published outside of that very specific context of talking about fat shaming, and those bodies are absent. It’s no deeper than the pats on the back they gave themselves for raising awareness.
    • When I was attending the stuff to organize a queer event they wanted a visual language interpreter, which is awesome. In Ottawa though, 40% of people speak French – and the entire event was English-only. There was an enthusiasm around the logistics for being accessible to the hearing impaired. There was zero enthusiasm around being accessible to French speakers, and in fact was pretty much dismissed. I attributed that discrepancy in enthusiasm to the fact that the former gets pats on the back, while the latter does not. The end result that was an event that was inaccessible to many people when it didn’t have to be the case.
    • Going on with that, linguistic access issues gets no air time in the local sj sphere. The list of what the sj movement cares about is actually quite narrow and led more by what’s rebloggable on Tumblr than regional needs. Social justice is not a zero sum game but what you have time to discuss in a meeting is.

    So it’s like the queer sj community is more into patting themselves on the back and elevating the like-minded (other people that pat themselves on the back.) That creates a clique. It’s unsurprising then to me that the same few people in Ottawa come to speak at every queer-related event despite this city having a million inhabitants.

    The clique is primarily under 30s, women and/or not-cis, absent of Francophones, poly, with extremely similar politics. It’s a very homogenous group within itself.

    It’s important to recognize that this is a community and that it is not above having the same issues around inclusion as any other community – even if this is one built on principles that would seem amenable to that.

    I’m done with the culture. I will continue to read sj stuff because there’s some really good material there which makes me a better person. However, I’m no longer all that interested in being considered a member of that community.

  • Peanut Butter Cheesecake

    Peanut Butter Cheesecake

    I was asked to make a peanut butter cheesecake for Christmas. I ended up doing one that was a mix of these two recipes.

    Oreo Crust

    • Box of Oreo Cookies (30 Sandwich Cookies)
    • 1 Cup Roasted Peanuts
    • 1/2 Cup Butter
    1. Melt the butter in a sauce pan.
    2. Grind up the peanuts and add to a large bowl.
    3. Add the cookies to the bowl and mash them up.
    4. Add the melted butter and mix it all together.
    5. Place the mixture at the bottom of a 10″ springform pan and pat it down.

    Cheesecake Filling

    • 32 oz Cream Cheese (4 Packages)
    • 5 Eggs
    • 1 1/2 Cups Brown Sugar
    • 1 Cup Peanut Butter
    • 1/2 Cup Whipping Cream
    • 1 Tsp Vanilla Extract
    • 1 Bag Reese’s Minis
    1. Set oven to 275 F.
    2. Cream brown sugar and peanut butter.
    3. Add eggs, vanilla, whipping cream, and cream cheese.
    4. Mix until smooth.
    5. Fold in Reese’s Minis.
    6. Pour filling into prepared crust.
    7. Place the cheesecake in the oven for 1.5 hours.
    8. Turn off the oven, leave the door ajar, and let the cheesecake cool to room temperature.
    9. Place in the refrigerator overnight.

    IMG_20131225_211422

    Thoughts

    This was well received. Even though I didn’t use a water bath, the cake did not crack and in fact was a little too moist in the centre. The crust was edible but hard to cut through in the thicker spots. I’m thinking skipping incorporating the roasted peanuts might help next time. Overall I thought the cheesecake was very good though.